How to stay positive when everything goes wrong?
When problems accumulate on all sides, we are attracted by the dark force. Three tips for moving from the darkness to the light. Laurent Freytrich *
Your business is bought and your boss turns you after ten years of hard work? Are you uncovered every month with several loans in progress? Libido side, it’s not party either? Not to mention the family involved and a health glitch discovered at the turn of a radio control In short, you have the feeling of cumulating problems!
Each problem contributes to generating the following in a bad sequence: a professional concern makes you aggressive, and it is your married life that goes into a spin, a financial problem stresses you, and it is the relations with your children who suffer from it.
To break these infernal spirals, to avoid isolating oneself and moping black, one must act methodically and follow good practices to remain positive in bad passes. Everything is a question of vision and positioning on the ladder of happiness. When problems make us fall all the way down, here are some tips for climbing each rung again.
Exploit the negative to become stronger
First, we must recognize that the very essence of life is to oscillate between good and bad surprises. The philosophy of Stoicism teaches us to concentrate our efforts on the elements in our power and to accept the external elements on which we cannot act. Without denial or reproach, you accept the situation.
After the acceptance, the analysis of causes: I’m on the verge of burnout at work because my boss is hysterical, I cannot go home because I’m not helped by my companion and my children. Understanding the sources of the problems always helps to solve some of them.
Finally, exploit negative situations to bounce back and enjoy moments of happiness later. Like Judo, you will use the blows to bring your own, set you in motion and keep your balance.
Visualize the positive aspects
This is the technique of glass half empty or half full. We must try to see the positive, even at the bottom of the wave. Being positive is subjective because happiness is a relative state of mind: a refugee child who has experienced war can claim to be happy in his new country with a sense of security when a spoiled child will truly feel unhappy to not have the latest fashionable toy. You necessarily know depressed people for no objective reason and bright people in the worst moments.
Train yourself also to eliminate the negative words of your vocabulary: replace “I will not succeed” by “I will do everything to succeed”. Unconsciously, your brain will start on a better foundation. Re-learn to express your emotions, to smile. Then treat yourself to a little pleasure! It’s important to know how to trigger this little shot of fleeting pleasure when everything goes wrong: a movie party or a party with friends, an hour of sport or meditation in the countryside. Okay, this quick pleasure is not the same as lasting happiness, but it does good. ‘
Prepare for change
To break the circle of misfortunes in series, we must give ourselves the means and have a vision of a better future. Staying passive and waiting for it to pass is rarely a solution. Start by setting new goals, easy to reach quickly, to rack up small wins and regain positive energy.
At each step, give yourself a reward or a little treat. Create a healthy routine to recover a good dynamic (change of diet, smooth recovery of the sport, etc.). You must be able to rely on a solid physique, develop a strong mind to never give up and succeed in transforming your negative emotions.
By taking each problem at the base, you treat each source of trouble one by one: renegotiate your credits with your bank, then update your LinkedIn profile and start looking for a new job. A small step for you, but a big step to get out of the “all is bad” period and find a happy situation.
For the Chinese sage Lao Tzu, “happiness is born of misfortune, misfortune is hidden within happiness”. You have to find it! And when, finally, the sun returns, enjoy even more happiness. Then prepare the next storm by working to discover you, to know you better to know where to take refuge. Thus, “when everything goes wrong” is a situation that is preparing when all is well!